Thursday, September 10, 2009

Fun Zone

MOM : "Wake up, son. It is time to go to school."
SON : "But why, Mama? I do not want to go to school."
MOM : "Give me two reasons why you do not want
to go to school."
SON : "One, all the children hate me. Two, all the teachers hate me."
MOM : "Oh! that is not a reason. Come on, you have to go to school." SON : "Give me two good reasons WHY I should go to school?"
MOM : "One, you are FIFTY-TWO years old and should understand your responsibilities. Two, you are the PRINCIPAL of the school.

One employee told his boss, “Sir, Increase my salary, I got married recently.” The boss replied, “The Company cannot compensate for the accidents happened outside of the company.”

Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's
Degree and the
woman gets her Masters.


Guide: "I welcome you all to Niagara Falls". These are the world''s largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20 supersonic planes passing  by cannot be heard. 
Now may I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara Falls? "

    A little boy was attending his first wedding.
    After the service, his cousin asked him,
    "How many women can a man marry?"

    "Sixteen," the boy responded.
    His cousin was amazed that he
    had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?"

    "Easy", the little boy said. "All you have to
    do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better,
    4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."

CONVERSATIONS WITH TECHNICAL SUPPORT

Tech Support: "What browser are you using, Netscape or Microsoft?"
Customer: "Netscape."
Tech Support: "Could you read to me what it says at the top of the window?"
Customer: "''Global Travel Conference - Microsoft Internet Explorer''


Tech Support: "This has Windows 98 on it --
did it have Windows 98 or 95 on it when it was sent out for repair?"

Customer: "I think it had Office 97."


A young businessman had just started his own firm.
He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished
with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come
into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot
shot, the businessman picked up the phone and
started to pretend he had a big deal working.
He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.
Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"
The man said, "Yeah, I''ve come to activate your phone lines."

An englishman and santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!

Patient: Doctor, are you sure I'm suffering from pneumonia?
Once a doctor was treating his patient with pneumonia but the patient died of typhus.

Indian Doctor: Don't worry, it won't happen to you.
If I treat someone with pneumonia he will die of pneumonia only."

    Santa: Why didn't you marry?
    Banta: I was searching for an ideal match.
    Santa: So, you didn't find an ideal girl?
    Banta: I found one.
    Santa: Then?
    Banta: She was also searching for an ideal match.





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